Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

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What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

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You idiot.

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Women's rights.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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Well, you see, I'm an extractor fan.

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A miserable man committed suicide.

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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