what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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What happens if u call a black kid names? He tells an adult and u get in trouble

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what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

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Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

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Q: How do you stop a hijacked plane? A: The plane can't be hijacked because the pilots cabin is not accessable until the plane lands.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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What happens when you breed a T-rex and a mammoth? You can't, both animals are extinct.

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

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Can anyone Lenin money?

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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