What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

no im only tryin to keep it real like a broken peice of cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black person living in the US? An African American.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the fart say to the butt........bye

thumb_up thumb_down -8

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats black and blue and has three legs? An abused deformed person.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops