My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Get up Look in the mirror

Q: Why did the white man die? A: because he had cancer

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

A muslim paints Mohammed

why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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