What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 pounds. My girlfriend was a fatass. Wasn't gonna make that mistake again when I found a woman to marry.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

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Boy, is it hot this summer! How hot is it?! So hot that many people have died as a result!... Drink plenty of water.

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Justin Beiber

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Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

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Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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