How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

Your dad walked into a bar. It was a gay bar.

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

An Asian with a big dick.

b

What's the difference between an apple and a fruit? None

What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

knock knock come in !

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

24

What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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