What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

A man penetrates another man.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

Knock Knock. Come in.

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

whats worse than a worm in your apple? the Holocaust

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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