Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

Yesterday i had a conversation with my husband. I asked him if he slept with another women. He said yes

2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

i just wrote this so hard

Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

What's worse than finding a worm in the apple you're eating? Many things could be worse than that, from the less severe e.g. Finding half a worm in the apple you're eating to the more severe, such as the total collapse of civilization.

Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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