What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

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Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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Immigration Laws

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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black chicken. kfc

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A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Black guy something something. Anti-racist punchline.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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If you go to America, you won't see any fat black people. They're all dead and in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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