A midget walked under a bar.

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

what did the black kid get for christmas? I dont know....whatever he wrote on his wishlist.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding two worms. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Dying from cancer.

Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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