Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

ewrg

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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