What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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the world is made out of 4 things. protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

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I've been hearing a lot of Jew jokes lately, Anne Frankly I'm sick off it.

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Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver comes into the bar and gulps down the guys drink and the guy starts crying the lorry driver says "dont cry ill buy you another" thee guy sas "it's not that today i woke up late for work and when i got there i got fired and then when i went to go home feeling depressed my car doesnt startand so i walk home and i find my wife in bed with the gardener and so i came here to die but you drank my poison"

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Who did the dinosuar, that's pretty fricken awesome!

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

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You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

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Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

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A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

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I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

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To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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