Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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knock,knock you suck

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

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a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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