What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

This anti-joke below is hilarious.

How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

What do you call a black Englishmen? Rodger

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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