What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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what do you tell a black man getting hit by a police baton? that is racial inequality, and you no longer have to take that due to Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

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Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

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Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

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How many dinosaurs does it take to fill a pool? I don't know and no one will know as they are extinct organisms

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whats purple and attacks like a bear? a purple bear

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

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vitamin c

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

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My therapist says that I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops