What comes after Friday? A ?.

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

John lazzaro likes dick

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

Adam: knock knock!! Eve: who's there? Adam: don't be silly, just open the f*cking door!!

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

one stop shop

What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

24

A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

Your life

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

A sober Irish individual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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