What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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Did you hear about the blind man who got stuck by a bus? Poor guy never saw it coming.

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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nothing

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

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I have read the terms and conditions

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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What happened to him after he died? He got buried.

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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Justin Beiber is a good singer

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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