What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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