a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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I read the terms of service.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

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What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

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What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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30cm = 0,3meters

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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