What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

Who row's? •Liam Findlay

Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

What african eat for christmas Sand.

What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

Knock Knock, Who's There? Legolas They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard!

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

How many people does it take to screw a light bulb? One, it's all the sex they can get.

Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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