What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

why did the black man go to court he was a lawyer it's is job

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

Who is it?

How do you kill a circus? Assuming this is metaphorical usage of the word 'kill', you would withdraw funds, involve the SPCA and offer all the major performers better contracts elsewhere.

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

where is the world?

Q: what did Timmy get for his 8th birthday A: killed MR

Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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