two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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Where did little susie go during the explosion? Everywhere :) What color were her eyes? Blue. One blew this way and one blew the other way. :p Knock, knock Who's there? Not susie :)

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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when a friend comes over and says: hey, do you have a bathroom??? NO!!! I shit in my yard!!!!!

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

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Racial Equality

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

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I walked in ony my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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Why do girls enjoy listening to Justin Biebers music? Because he sings moderately well and appeals to a younger audience.

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The name "Hunter Barksdale".

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

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Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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I have a riddle. What's black and white and red all over? Nothing. That's impossible.

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What's short and weak and has no life..........a Jordan pederson!

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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