If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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Knock knock Whos there? The Gestapo

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Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

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Whats funnier than a black guy dieing? Everything thats not funny

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, because if it's black and white, it can't be red.

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What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

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What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Uh no, yogurt as in the bacteria that they add to milk in order to make the finished product yogurt. You see, while the effect is seen in twins (for example if one twin gets raped, the other gets a fucking sore ass) Sorry, I am still under trance here myself, you get out of it, I am gonna have some fun, go splash some water on your face. I mean people go like "woah that is impossible it only happens in rare cases and so on right?" Fun stuff: Yogurt, you can seal yogurt in a steel container miles away after separating its culture (basically having a colony living together and then moving them away from each other as in 30000 kilometers and sealing them in soundproof safe`s and whatnot. Feed one half of the yogurt, and the other one far far away begins munching into thin air, now keep the food close to the yogurt, and the bacteria will begin "begging for it" (as in when baby chicks notice the parent has arrived with food), and so will the culture of yogurt sealed in a safe 30000 miles away. Why? Living in similar states, brings a natural connection, we are attracted to similarities, and as far as the human knowledge of the LAW of attraction goes, distance is not a factor, look it up, or just believe me.

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What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

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If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

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Why did the gay guy come out of the closet? He finally found the shirt he was looking for

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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