What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam. To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

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What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

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Knock Knock Who's there Doctor Doctor Who

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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How does Batman's mom call him home for supper? Nothing. Batman's mom is dead.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

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Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

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someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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mikey is cute

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

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A man is pulled over because he is suspected of drunk driving. The officer comes to the window and is greeted by a man who then replies: What seems to be the officer, problem?

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There once was a mountain climber. He loved to climb mountains. He had climbed all of the world's tallest peaks...except Mount Everest. So, one day he decides to climb Mount Everest. He takes weeks and weeks to prepare himself. He trains and trains three times a day till he thinks he is ready to climb Mount Everest. Climbing up it takes forever. It feels like it has been days in the dreary cold. Finally, he reaches the peak. It is a glorious occasion. On the way down, a huuuuge storm rolls in. He falls down a cliff and breaks both of his legs. The pain is unbearable. He screams and screams but no one hears him. Finally after what seems like days, a group of monks find him and carry him to their monastery. Chapter Two Once the man wakes up he thanks the monks for saving his life. They give him a room, food, and nice clothes. Every night in his room, he hears a banging behind his dresser. It is really loud and he is quite annoyed by it. The next morning he asked the head monk what the noise is. The head monk says " I cannot tell you, you aren't a monk." He hears the banging noise every night. HE asks the head monk every morning but he always says he cant tell him because he isn't a monk. So the climber decides to become a monk. After years and years of training to become a monk, he finally becomes one. Chapter Three So he says to the head monk, " I am a monk, so now can you tell me?" The head monk replies, " I can't tell you, but i can help show you. So he pushes the drawer back and reveals a little door, He gives the man a lantern and says to go through it. The man goes through the door into a little, dark tunnel, eager to finally find out what the noise was. He crawls for what seems like hours and hours and hours and days and days and days and days. He finally gets to the door where the banging noise is and opens the door. What he sees amazes him. Do you want to know what the banging noise was? I cant tel you, you aren't a monk!

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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