Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

Shea's sty....

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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