What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Womens rights

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops