Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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I love pissing people off :P

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What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

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Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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vitamin c

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What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

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Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops