Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

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What's big and long? My dick.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

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Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

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Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

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What do you get when you stab a four year old in the chest 57 times A dead body

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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How many Jews do you have to kill in order to make a museum? 6 Million.

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If you go to America, you won't see any fat black people. They're all dead and in prison.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

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what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

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The name "Hunter Barksdale".

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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