What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

masturbating on a tarc bus

Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

i just wrote this so hard

Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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