Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

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Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

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Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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