Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Q: Where did Sarah go when the bomb exploded? A: Everywhere.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

Why did the toddler fall in the pool? He was irresponsibly left unattended outside and tripped on the edge of the pool. He died within two minutes and his parents were blamed for his death.

it's funny because it's funny

:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

A couple is playing chess. The man then chokes his wife to death, throws her body in a woodchopper, and eats her like cereal- Frost

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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