What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

What ended in the year 1970? 1969

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

Did you hear about the black kid that had a gun? Yeah, it's a.20 gage that his father bought him for Christmas so that he could go hunting together

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...