why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What do fish and shoe laces have in common? nothing.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw a piece of food that looked yummy, and he wanted to eat it. Unfortunately, the chicken was run over by a car and died.

How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

why cant fat people walk because they are fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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