What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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A man walks into a bar and gets drink

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A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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heat!

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was dead Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was stapled to the first koala

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

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Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

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A priest was walking home from church one day when he found a young boy crouching naked in the bushes. The priest contacted local law enforcement authorities on his cell phone and proceeded home once they arrived.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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