Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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What comes after 69... Mouthwash

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Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

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Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

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friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

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Why did the chicken cross the buffet table? To get to the other sides.

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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What's worse than being a Packer fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... Oh, wait...

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some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops