A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

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What does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? Ow

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

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A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

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What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

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Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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What did the nerd say to the cheerleader? Wouldn't you like to know? Mind your own business.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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roses are red violets are blue tulips are white daisies are yellow

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Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

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There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

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A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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