Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

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why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

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What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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The tooth fairy, Santa and, Justin Beiber are the same, little kids believe in them, whats wrong with America these days

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Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Do you know what's impossible? A chink whos not smart.

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Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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