Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

thumb_up thumb_down -50

To mamma so fat..............nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

thumb_up thumb_down -70

What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

thumb_up thumb_down +45

poop nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

thumb_up thumb_down +41

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I went to school. Then I came home.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops