Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

What stops a fully black english man from marrying a fully chinese women, the language barrier of course!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

To mamma so fat..............nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A white female funded a strong relationship with an african american male. One year later the white female was driving to work and had to slam on the breaks to stop a potention crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops