What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

What's the answer to all your problems The answer

K

My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

i am a dino. RAWR.

why do firemen wear red suspenders. I dont know because they go with there hat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

I will create more jobs for americans

fuck you you punkass piece of shit I hope you burn in my uncle's titties and ass rape yourself while screaming "make it stop!'. Then, I hope that you take a titanic needle and shove it up your lower kidney until it tears open and all your bodily fluids spill out into an ocean of shit. Also, I have 73 balls with a ballsack for each ball. So, I have 73 ballsacks.

A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

A. Where was Sally during the boston marathon bombing? Q. Everywhere. www.facebook.com/wowedgy

What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

Aaron Pfeifer likes men

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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