- Anti Joke

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

What did the Republican say after he got off the ferris wheel but before he went on the roller coaster? "Boy, that ferris wheel sure was fun! Now I will ride the roller coaster!"

Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

why couldnt hellen keller drive? she was a woman.

why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

Why did everyone at school think that Susan was so hot? They set her on fire.

What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

A: knock knock B: the door is open, why don't you come right in?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead