Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a toothpick

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What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

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i just wrote this so hard

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

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I brought a parachute as carry on luggage, I was pulled aside at security and missed my flight.

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The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

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A muslim walks into a airport. He then boards his flight and is flown to his destination.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

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Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

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Yo mamma so fat, she's on a diet and is losing weight at a good, steady rate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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