What did the clinically depressed man get for Christmas? He received many of splendid gifts and a joyous day with his family. He realized that his life isn't so bad after all, and went home with his head held high. He was then eaten by a vicious looking 7.

woman's rights

A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

hi

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone. He proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

What do you call the guy who made this page. Answer: A sucker mouth bitch.

Why did Madona rub shit on her vagina? Because she was horny.

Women's rights...

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...