There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

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Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

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Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

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What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

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how do you complete an exam. dont be kaizen.

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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Link ate ink to make him sink.

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

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Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

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Racial equality.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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Why did Sara fell off her swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sara

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

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How do u say hi to a black person JUST SAY HI RACIST

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Why couldn't the child with down syndrome zip up their jacket.... it was a button jacket ... you asshole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops