Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

in soviet russia, cow milks you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Black man and a Hispanic man were sitting in the back seat of a car. Who was driving? Their Asian friend who offered to take them to get lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two guys walk into a bar, and they ordered two drinks. Then the bartender said, "Two dollars, please." - Brandie PANG

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What a wonderful life!!! *gunshot*

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the clitoris say to the labia? I'm from the hood, the clitoral hood.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops