A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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Why was the man whistling? He was calling his friend.

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

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A person from Singapore eats

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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Dakota Fanning

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

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hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

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Yo mamma is so fat that she is likely to consume large amounts of food regularly.

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HOLY SHIT!!!!

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

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What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops