What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

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What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

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I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

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Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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I'm on the seafood diet. I eat clams and shrimp because it is healthy for me.

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

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If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

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How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

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What's 9+10? 19.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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I work at jcpenny

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What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

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What's hiding in Redfoo (from LMFAO)'s afro? Nobody knows...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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