why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? I threw a ball at her.

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What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

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Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

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sorry son your nanas been put down

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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How do the Chinese name their children? They decide on a name that both parents can agree upon, and they write that on the certificate of birth.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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