Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

Bacon is delcious.

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

a jew, a latino and an aboriginal walk into a bar this is an example of a great inter-racial comunity

Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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