A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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A Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They end up getting into a heated argument. After about an hour of back and forth they decide that each person has a valid point, agree to disagree, and go about there business.

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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Hurricane Sandy should be named A-Rod. Cuz he dosent hit anything

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

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- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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