Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Knock Knock DAMMIT WOMAN MAKE ME A SAMMACH

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what's brown and sticky? A Stick

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

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A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

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what is the world worst joke? this one

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You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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How did sarah break her arm? She was in a tragic car accident. An ambulance arrived and quickly rushed her to the hospital where she was cared for by medical professionals.

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Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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